Love is Patient: Part 2

Wrath: The opposite of patience

The opposite of patience is anger, a quick temper, and wrath. There is probably no place where this is more apparent than on the highway. It seems everyone is in such a hurry and no one has much patience for others on the road. Just accidentally cut someone off on the road and see what happens. This has become such a problem in the United States that we even have a name for it, “Road Rage.” People get so mad at someone else’s driving that they go beyond yelling and screaming and attempt to retaliate with their own vehicles. In some areas it has gotten so bad that people will even shoot at each other over minor traffic infractions.

Wrath is not limited to the roadway but, in some relationships, it is firmly entrenched. The use of anger and wrath in a relationship is often the result of a pattern of behavior developed over many years, and sometimes over many generations. Anger is often chosen because it can produce short term results. When we yell and scream our children they are apt to comply, if only out of fear. While anger can produce short term results, it produces long term damage that can be hard to erase. James tells us something rather remarkable about anger, “For the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” (James 1:20 NKJV) While wrath can produce immediate results, it can never produce the righteousness of God in ourselves or the people we relate to. Love would rather see righteousness established than mere compliance and acquiescence in our relationships.

Wrath places a huge emotional weight on any relationship. King Solomon said, “A stone is heavy and sand is weighty, but a fool's wrath is heavier than both of them.” (Proverbs 27:3 NKJV) The burden of our wrath is often carried by those closest to us. This emotional weight can sap the life and joy out of a home or a relationship. It causes people to live in fear, always fearing the next outburst, always “walking on eggshells.” The venting of wrath is also a mark of extreme selfishness. We blow up, yell and scream, and then we feel better. Our anger has been release and now we are “over it.” We feel better yet it is those around us who have paid the price. We are ready to “move on” yet the people closest to us are left hurting and wounded. We need to understand that this is not love. Love would care for others, love would consider their needs and interests before ours, yet wrath thinks only of itself. “Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, for anger resides in the bosom of fools.” (Ecclesiastes 7:9)

Next we will look at ways to grow in patience. David Robison