Love hopes all things

No one ever got married believing that their life would be miserable. All newlywed couples start out their married life with hopes and dreams of a life full of love, joy, and unfettered companionship, but, inevitably, difficult times come and the character and nature of their love for each other is tested. For many couples, the disappointment and disillusionment that is breed in these times of difficulty is too much to overcome and, for many, the marriage falls apart. Upwards of one third of new marriages in the United States will end in divorce. While the reasons for divorce are varied and often complex, for most couples going through a divorce, the loss of hope by one or both partners certainly contributes to their decision to end the relationship.

A former pastor of mine once said that all relationships go through three distinct stages: the honeymoon stage, the reality stage, and the redemptive stage. In the beginning, everything is great. You are so much “in love” that nothing bothers you and you cannot imagine ever having an argument or a disagreement. Then, as time goes on, you come to notice that the other person really does have faults and the little things that once seemed “cute” now start to get on your nerves. You become more irritable and even the littlest things often spark heated arguments. It is at this stage when many relationships fall apart, but if you can press beyond this point and love each other with a godly love, then you will experience a deeper relationship that few ever find. One of the keys to making it through the “reality” stage to the “redemptive” stage is hope.

Love does not always get what it wants when it wants it. Hope is the ability to wait for what we want. “For in hope we have been saved, but hope that is seen is not hope; for who hopes for what he already sees? But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.” (Romans 8:24-25) But this waiting is not passive or inactive, but hope actually empowers us to continue laboring for good in our relationships while we wait for what we desire. “Or is He speaking altogether for our sake? Yes, for our sake it was written, because the plowman ought to plow in hope, and the thresher to thresh in hope of sharing the crops.” (1 Corinthians 9:10) If we loose hope, we give up, but if we hope all things, then we will continue in doing good even when we don’t see the object of our hope.

Another reason hope is so important in any relationship is because it is a precursor to faith. “Who against hope believed in hope, that he might become the father of many nations; according to that which was spoken, ‘So shall thy seed be.’” (Romans 4:18 KJV) Abraham’s reality stood in stark contrast to the promise of God. God had promised him a son, but Abraham was pushing 100 years in age and Sarah was nearly 90. When faced with the improbability of the promise of God, it was Abraham’s hope in the promise that gave him courage to believe. Without hope, there is no reason to believe. “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” (Hebrews 11:1) Love hopes all good things for its relationships and, in hope, it believes.

So where do we find hope when our reason for hope seems dim? Consider the following scriptures.

“Remember that you were at that time separate from Christ, excluded from the commonwealth of Israel, and strangers to the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world.” (Ephesians 2:12) Paul makes it clear, without Christ, all our hope is false hope. It is only when we are reconciled back to God and enter into a relationship with Jesus Christ that we will find a hope that is not dependent upon us, our circumstances, or someone else. In Christ we have a hope that is backed up by the power and authority of God Himself.

“For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, so that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.” (Romans 15:4) While God is the God of all hope, it is important that we know the things that we might hope for. The scriptures are full of the promises of God. By reading them, we understand what is ours by our rebirth into God’s family. We understand what it means to be children of God. We learn of the nature and character of God. And our eyes are opened to all that God wants and has for us in this life and the life to come. As we read the scriptures we can then begin to hope for what they offer.

“Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:13) As we learn to draw near to God, He fills us with His joy and peace. It is hard for a heart that is full of sadness and torment to hope, but when we experience the joy and peace that comes from God, hope is a natural response. Hope is not something we can muster up in our own strength, but is the result of the power of the Holy Spirit at work in our hearts. It is not enough to know God, but we need to experience Him in the person of the Holy Spirit. As we experience God, our hope will increase.

David Robison